Ep. 16, Joyride To Egypt: Like A Runaway Train

Runaway Train by dakann.deviantart (digitally altered - click for original)

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(Source: Getty Images)

“engine, engine, number 9, rolling down Chicago line, how many stations till he stops? 1,2,3,4,5,6,7…”
I awoke with this childhood refrain playing in my brain. It was a jumprope rhyme, a favorite of mine when my girlfriends and I were playing jumprope in the schoolyard. One girl on each end of the rope, one girl in the middle between them, jumping the rope as they cycled it in a large arc over her head, coming down and around again, faster and faster as they counted the number of times the girl in the middle successfully jumped the rope passing beneath her feet on its way up and around again in another revolution. The winner was the girl who could jump to the highest number before stopping or falling flat on her face.

Engine number 9 was out of control, barrelling down the track with no intention whatsoever of stopping. If it was a train wreck coming, so be it, I was utterly unable to abandon the Captain of my heart. I awoke bright and early, resolved to jump that rope as fast as it lands in front of my feet, and if I fall, well, it couldn’t be much worse than sprawling on the asphalt of the playground back in gradeschool, could it? I could still be the winner, couldn’t I?!!

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It was a pesky little problem, though, not one very likely to disappear easily. Buzzing in my ear like a gnat on a hot sweaty day in the garden, “…and kill you as I want to, too.”  Flap it with my sweatcloth, slap it with my grimy glove, there it was, still buzzing obnoxiously in my ear. As I was laying in my bed, I remembered a strange scene from my life in 1977. I was 19…

67 Chevy Impala Lowrider (Source: http://oi25.tinypic.com/zx678k.jpg)

A light blue ’67 Chevy Impala slowly appeared on the side street from beside the wall as I left my work building at the end of late shift. It was dark, the parking lot was empty, the night was hot. The window on the passenger side of the Impala was down, and the car moved slowly on the road parallel with my path to my car. I looked up at the passenger as I saw a strange movement from the corner of my eye. He held a large handgun aimed steadily at me as the car maintained the same speed as my pace. My car was ahead of me, parked in the front left corner of the parking lot.

My eyes never left the eyes of the man aiming his gun at me. I reached my car as they reached the corner, his gun still aimed, our eyes still locked. I stood at the door of my car, unable to move except to turn my head, following those eyes as the car turned right at the corner to pass directly in front of my car. Speechless and breathless, almost paralyzed except for the imperceptible movement of my eyes following his eyes in extreme slow motion, the light blue ’67 Chevy Impala kept moving, slowly creeping past my car, until the angle to aim at me must have become uncomfortable, and the eyes disappeared back into the car, the gun disappearing into the shoebox of unforgettable memories from my life.

Nobody can take one day from my life, and no one can add one minute to it. Only Allah knows the date and time of my death, and it is already written on the gravestone of my fate. Islam has given me the greatest peace, it erased my fear of death. I don’t have any clue how I will die, maybe it will be on an altar of love, maybe not, but it’s already written and wherever the end is, I will die, or die, or die… So what’s the difference if I ride a runaway train barrelling full steam ahead into an Egyptian Tunnel of Love??!!

(Source: http://images.fineartamerica.com/images-medium/tunnel-of-love-2012-kathryn-strick.jpg)

Maybe that’s not really a qnat in my ear, come to think of it. I think I hear a whistle blowing, and the Captain of my heart is calling out, “AAAAAALLLLLL Abooooooooooooard!” I jumped out of bed and ran to answer his amazing love letter I was ready to die for. This was no time for stopping, the jumprope was whirling and I was hopping! I hit send after composing what I hoped was a reply that wouldn’t send me sprawling on the gradeschool playground and jumped up to get ready for work.

Flying Train, digitally altered (Source: http://worth1000.s3.amazonaws.com/submissions/9443000/9443092_46fe_625x1000.jpg)

Rising up suddenly into the air, my amazing magic carpet suddenly morphed one more time and the rollercoaster car transformed into a shiny steam engine train! Then the speeding train blasted right through the mountain of my doubt, drilling an Egyptian tunnel of love all the way through to the center of my heart. I barrelled through the day, barely slowing down long enough to stop at the next email station…

From: Mohamed

To: Aisha

Date: Tue, 29 June, 1999, 19:31:24

Subject: To Habibaty and Amiraty Aisha

My sweetheart Aisha

I love you more and more every day, you are a very great girl, I love all of you very much, hard to wait and hard to control myself, I am very longing to you. Allow me to use your words once again, my Darling Aisha:

Dearest Mohamed, Oh, yummmmyummmyum, I think you are pure Egyptian chocolate, and I will surely die the most satisfied wife on earth!!! (Source: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a4/Death_by_chocolate_(5119851313).jpg)

You are right I am pure egyptian chocolate and I am sure you will not die now, because you will prefer to live with me long to enjoy your life as you never had before, you will be the most satisfied wife on earth, insha’aAllah for sure!!! I will try my best to make you the most happy woman in the world.

Remember I shared with you in the beginning that I am purposely searching for the things I feel are most compatible with my happy buttons… lol if we are always pressing each other’s happy buttons, we will have a beautiful life together as a family, and even more fun at night!

I am very sure you are right!

Yes, my love, I am very emotionally stable, I can tell you that as honestly as I can tell you I think I will never stop smiling if you are all this, such a wonderful husband and a wild horse too ;^))) by the way, you know the stable is the place where the horse spends the night and eats his favorite food…

I will teach you many secrets about the Egyptian famous sexy food like the young pigeon, the lobster, the shrimp, and many natural things better than this, you will love my way of cooking and your enjoyable will be my first attention ;^) (Source: http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e125/wandelra/030-12.jpg)

Well, to be honest with you about my stability, my darling, I’m all in perfect health, and I don’t really have any hangups about sex

Don’t worry if you one day for any reason hang up about sex or feel you don’t like it you will never lose me and I will never be fooling around behind your back, because I love your personality before your body, I will be always with you in the good time and the bad time, insha’aAllah all your time with me will be a very good time

that’s my Californian upbringing, as well as coming from my father’s comfortable Irish Catholic background. I know my ex had lots of hangups, he thought sex was dirty, and too much work, he always came home mean and drunk… that was all very disappointing, as I told you before, so I turned to doing artwork in the evenings instead. The Shield of Achilles: http://meieus.com/achillesshield I created a life size reconstruction, or replica, of the shield which Homer describes in the ancient Greek poem of the Trojan War… I don’t know if you’re familiar with the Iliad, but my artwork was a very huge work of love for me, and in fact I’m sure it was my only expression of love, there was none in my home… I’m an energetic woman, I told you this, and I turned my energy to studies of ancient Greece, too bad for my ex husband, but he wouldn’t have enjoyed it anyway… in the end it was my loss, though, the way I look at it. But anyway, my energy was well spent and I made a little stir in Classical circles, and that was very rewarding. There’s more fun to be had in that arena, but it’s no substitute for real love, and for a happy family. Another thing I love about you is I think you will enjoy my interests too, and that is very exciting for me!

Do whatever you love to do and I will try my best with my pleasure sharing you your hobbies, and I believe you will be happy to share with me my hobbies too, like the small little animals, and plants and flowers and roses, when we are gardening our house roof together.

But I know the miracle you are talking about, I believe it is true love that every heart instinctively yearns for, and I think it is the miracle we are in the middle of

No I don’t feel we in the middle of, I think we almost reach the top or we will reach it very soon when we spend half of our honeymoon here in our apartment in Egypt very soon (Source: http://www.nosegraze.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/egypt_nile_2014.jpg)

yaaaa mohamed it is for me as you say it is for you… your words make me hard to catch my breath and I feel fire but I can’t stop smiling! I think you are driving me deliciously crazy, Habibi, Mohamed my Sultan w’Asali. Oh, I will never stop kissing you back wherever you kiss me, in thanks to Allah for giving me you for my husband! I can tell you I have no intention of stopping myself, I want to feel this good for so long as it can go on… insha’aAllah forever!!!

Insha’aAllah we will be in this deep love me and you forever, as more as we know each other as more we will love each other, we do find each other because our purpose is the same

I can also tell you, I think I’m blessed by Allah because my body is young looking, I believe He protected me from those long sad years, and I know my body responds to you like that whirlwind you talked about too! I feel safe from your words to trust you… well, I think because it’s true that I am trusting you completely, that is why your words are affecting me so much… ;^))) I’m dreaming all the time of how sweet you will be to me… you make my heart beat like crazy!

You did more to my energy, my body, my brain and my heart too!

Wowowow! I almost fell out of my chair when I read you were corresponding with 27 ladies!! What a list, Sultan!!

Your sultan see now only the best woman in the world, his Amirah AISHA

You have made me very honored, Mohamed, and I will make you a wonderful scented massage oil, so you will always have glorious back rubs, my King, my Husband and my Boyfriend! (Source: http://www.peacetreehealing.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/abhyangastarblog.jpg)

My Darling Aisha remember it’s drive me very crazy, the massage kind of care and kind of love from my wife, this make me feel I love her too, and when I have this feeling make me very interested to express my feeling as action back to her. You see how I am very honest and open mind with you, I tell you exactly what I feel, so this help you to understand me more, and you can be very open mind with me too.

Hahaha what an incurable romantic you have fallen in love with, you have no idea! ;^))) Then again, maybe you do have an idea, don’t you!!!

I have an idea because you just translate my feeling because your English is much better than mine

Oh Sweetheart, I long to be there, I can’t wait to see you, to meet you in reality, and know this is really and truly for real

I want to touch your face I want to hug you and touch you…

And feel your fingers on my lips and know it’s not a dream, Mohamed, oh, it’s going to be sooo much better than a dream, I just know it!

Do you believe me now sometimes the reality is wonderful more than any dream we ever have?!

Alhamdulillah, all night long! ;^) hahaha MOhamaaaaaaaaad! Come to your Wife!!! I’m waiting for you up on the roof!!!

Yes, Yes, my Love, my Sweetheart, my Darrrrrrrrling! I will be every moment with you forever very soon

Ohhh, thank you for telling me how private the house is, how wonderful and beautiful it looks, my darling, I will love you forever, I can’t believe we have found each other

The roof on the house and on the farm is very private… if you like we can keep a bed on our roof so you can sleep under the stars (Source: http://www.greatplainsconservation.com/bushbuzz/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/ODW123.jpg)

mmmm and you are incredible, you have told your kids about me, I can’t explain what a huge blessing you are to me, Habibi, but believe me I will show you, just wait! My love, I need to ask you about these words: Allah knows how much I care for the kids education and future more than me and you, I am very sure me and you will be very happy here more than any place in the world, but the kids are still very young to leave them there. I don’t understand what you mean, to leave them there…? But I was thinking of all of us being together, what am I missing? I was thinking when it’s summer, school is out for 3 months, and it would be wonderful to be in Egypt (all of us, of course!) During summer. They only go to day camp because I have to go to work. I guess we have still so much to talk about… how do you see all this working out, my love?

(Source: http://www.fotosearch.com/UNN893/u12352042/) Yes insha’aAllah it will work out, I never think to separate you from your kids, I like we be a very good family, and this is the main reason I choose the hard way to step down again and work very hard in North America only to be with you and your kids all the year. When I am there 8 or 9 months I have to work to live, but when we will be here for 3 or 4 months, me and you don’t need to work, and for sure all of us will be together in Egypt or the States. I am very understanding to the situation, and I choose to be like a father for your kids.

I see it looks like education is a problem, so as you say, that’s a priority, living in America so they can go to school… I didn’t even think about this problem, it never occurred to me, and it really is disappointing to think of sacrificing the dream of living in Egypt, especially since I know you are right that we would be very happy there.

We can give chance to the kids most of the year to study there, and some months for all of us to enjoy here, and who knows about the nearest future, could be more English schools open in Egypt near here and make it easier for all of us to live here and handle the fee for the schools. Me and you will keep contact with the Egyptian Embassy and asking for all that information. Allah will never forget us as long as we honestly love each other as a good family.

so if we could have the next best choice I would like it if we could be there as a family as much as possible. I feel a little bit at a losss, sweetheart, there must be many factors that I’m not aware of, but wouldn’t this be possible?

Insha’aAllah every thing good is possible!!! We have to feel and say to Allah thanks for what we have finally found each other after long time looking for the right person we could fall in love with. Nobody can get every thing as he wants. To be together is enough, but to be with you and be in Egypt to relax and don’t work maybe is too much to ask Allah to fixing for me every thing as I want. What Allah wants is best and most important thing.

How will I be married to you, sweetest Mohamed? What kind of procedure is it in Egypt? I’m sure I don’t know what to expect, it’s all so fascinating, and I know I need you to tell me everything!

When you come here just bring with you a marital statement showing that you are clearly divorced and translated to Arabic and accepted from Egyptian Embassy in USA, and permission that your US Government allowed you to marry, and also if you have any certificate that you are Muslimah. It is not for the Government, they do not care if I will marry any religion, but this one I will show to my relatives to proud soooo much of my MUSLIM American wife, and simply they will accept our marriage in few moments.

Sweetheart, I’m so excited to make plans to come visit… it’s important for you to know some things, and I need to know your plans, too… I can’t possibly consider coming to you without my children, (they would pelt me with grapes!!!)

Please allow me to talk with you freely as I do always, and please try to understand me. I was thinking if you come for short time like two weeks and this is the first time we will meet, I prefer we will be by ourselves because the time you will spend with me is short already and we are very need to every moment to ourselves for the first time. Also you will not stay away from them for so long time, the other reason I don’t like to show to my own people at the first time my wife’s kids, specially because all the relatives around me know my opinion before, and know some ladies want to marry me before but I completely refused because of only one child with her. But if you will not accept my idea, do what ever you want to do, and I will respect your opinion.

So this means it must be before school starts again in September. I don’t have enough vacation time at my work for more than 2 weeks. I can take more time, but I won’t get paid and to be honest my budget is very tight, especially now after having to buy the new car. I live modestly and I have enough to pay for us to come visit you, my sweet love, but it makes me very nervous, and I need some reassurance that you understand… I can’t afford to come for a long visit, I just don’t have the money.

About what you will spend here in Egypt, never worry, because I have enough for me and my wife to live nice life here, and this is the reason I don’t transfer money from Egypt to any where because it will lose too much value comparing to the $, so if I am there I have to work too like most of the people there, I am very understanding. But when I am here, I am on the top of my community, me and you with me!

(Source: http://www.abcteach.com/free/a/airplane1rgb.jpg) But if two weeks are ok, that would be wonderful, and it seems like August would be the right time and gives me time to find good airfares (insha’Allah!) And then insha’aAllah you will come here, maybe even returning with us, that would really be perfect!… but it seems like that is so fast, I hardly know what to think about it all, it’s soooo incredible…. we’ll just have to do more talking so I can be sure everything is clear, then we can make our plans together Insha’aAllah, this is the best way, to share our plans together it will be sooo much fun! Really, sweetheart, we will fly to you as fast as a jet. I will be soooo excited, and it will be the best and most exciting time in our lives, I can already believe it!

You are very welcome to your new home, my love!

here is my address and phone number, my Darling: [omitted for privacy] It would be sooo amazing if you call me, Mohamed, I will love to hear your voice! I think I will love your accent verrrry much ;^)))) I want to hear the voice of the man I love, from the lips I dream of kissing all night long, my sweet and loving husband to be… how beautiful you are to me, without even seeing you. Yes, of course I look at your pictures, I love the one close up that was with your profile, you are so handsome, and I love your eyes, I want to hear your voice, I think you will make me verrrry happy! I’m dreaming of softly snuggling in your arms, Sultan, mmmmm smiling with my eyes closed… (Source: http://www.dollsofindia.com/images/products/women-posters/sleeping-beauty-QI34_l.jpg) ;^))) I need lots of hugs, and I’ll give you lots of warm deep kisses in return! And all my love, too, my sweetheart ;^* Aisha

All my love to you too, my Darrrrling And deep kisses to your sweet honey lips Yours Forever Mohamed

“I don’t know about you, but I need a smoke after all that steamy lovemaking!”

I nearly jumped out of my skin, hearing a man’s voice so close to my right ear that I could feel his dangling black goatee on my shoulder.

“You damn Genie!” My right hand flew up in a fast defensive blocking motion, with the reflex of fear guiding it like a tomahawk missile and my fist connected with his nose before the words finished leaving my lips. The black twinkling eyes of that damn Genie sparkled as he rubbed his nose. The grin of the mad hyena spread across his face and he looked so adorable I burst out laughing, too!

Muffled through the hand still holding his nose, that damn Genie tried to sound indignant, “My Queen, your casbah has no need of a guard, if you have a fist like this!”

“You’re absolutely right, you damn Genie!” I snapped back, trying hard to control my silly grin, too. Standing up from my seat, I shoved him away from me as hard as I could. “I hired you as a guard, not as a busy body, good for nothing eavesdropping sneak!” The train was picking up speed again, clacking down the track, “What do you think you’re doing, snooping over my shoulder to read my email? I don’t know whether to fire you, or have Scheri turn you into a spider monkey!”

“Oh! Your wish is my command, Dearest Aisha!” I heard Scheherezade say enthusiastically, appearing dramatically in a shooting stream of rose colored smoke, tinkling and glittering golden coins and a breathtakingly lovely scent of roses. A flash of lightning lit up the area as she flapped her oustretched hand in a luxuriously lazy gesture of command, directed at the charmingly pudgy face of that damn Genie. Poof! In the flash of light he melted to a fourth of his original height, an eighth of his original width, and grew a wonderful long tail right in front of my eyes!

“Awesome, Scheri!!! I love it!!!” We hugged each other delightedly, as only the best of best friends can understand, and we cranked up the music on the stereo, laughing and dancing and playing with our new pet monkey all night long.

Dancing With Our New Pet Monkey!

Dancers Source and Dancing Monkey Source

;^)

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